The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.  (12)  She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

Proverbs 31:11-12 

Explanation:

There are four general qualities of the virtuous woman that are described in this text.  Today we see the first quality.  The virtuous woman is committed to her husband.  How do we know this?

Verse 11 says that her husband can completely trust her.  Notice the word “safely” in the phrase.  This means that a wise man can confidently and wisely put his trust in his wife if the wife is virtuous.  This trust is well placed.  He has “no need of spoil”.  This means that she contributes to the home in such a way that it helps him in his provision for the family.  They are working together to support the needs of the family.

Verse 12 describes this woman as the kind of person that will be faithful for a lifetime.  Her character and reputation warrant trust, and create an expectation that she will do good and not evil to her husband.  How does someone gain this kind of trust?  Years of faithfulness and loyalty to a person leads to the expectation that what has happened in the past will go on into the future.

Application:

To summarize in a way that applies to us, how is commitment expressed by a person of virtue?

1.  Trust with matters of the heart- intimacy. (v. 11a) 

A virtuous person is careful with the heart of their spouse.  They can trust that what is said in private confidence will not be made public. They are open to listen and respond to the heart of their spouse.  This produces an intimacy both physically and emotionally.

2.  Trust with matters of the home- stewardship. (v. 11b)

The stewardship of the resources of home leads to trust.  If a spouse cannot trust the other with their stuff, or their spending, this creates a problem for intimacy (#1) and longevity (#3).

3.  Trust that grows over a lifetime- longevity. (v.12)

Marriage is a lifelong commitment that is expressed every day in matters large and small.  Trust is built over time as loyalty and faithfulness are expressed in a multitude of ways. 

One cannot be called wise or virtuous if they are not committed in matters of intimacy and stewardship for the full longevity of the lifetime of their spouse.  If the person you are most committed to cannot trust you, then no one can.

Response:

• As you think through these 3 areas of intimacy, stewardship, and longevity, how are you doing with your spouse?  Where can you grow?
• If you don’t have a spouse now, are you growing as the kind of person that could make that kind of commitment?  Where can you grow?